she texted me & it wasn’t an apology

I unlocked my phone screen and saw Pranshi’s had text.

“Whatever you did was not good. You shouldn’t have called my sister.” She said.

“Really! And you wanted me to watch your nonsense silently. I had never thought that you would do this.” I replied.

She saw the text and didn’t say anything. I was not able to sleep but thinking about her. After a couple of hours, I fell asleep.

In the morning I got up and checked my phone to see whether she had texted me. There was no text from her. Then I freshened up and left for college. My face had become so dull, anyone in the world could see that I was going through a precarious situation. I entered the class and quietly took my seat. Piyush used to sit by my side. He noticed me and asked, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah! I am fine.” I replied.

“Yes, I can sense that from your face. Don’t be so sad. Just forget her and let’s study. After a week we have our final exams. Don’t you know that?” he said.

“Yeah. But I don’t know why she messes things up during or right before my important exams. Last year, she did the same thing before my board exams.” I said annoyingly.

“Leave it, man. Let’s study together.” he said.

“You are right. Let’s do it.” I got charged up.

During my college hours I focused on my studies and involved myself in the lectures, asked questions, and solved problems. But when the time came to return home, I became sad. But I didn’t want to waste my time anymore. I had slackened a lot in my studies because of being too engrossed in that relationship, so I had to work harder to catch up with the course. Two days passed, and I was slowly recovering from the trauma of breaking off with Pranshi. Suddenly my phone rang, and it was an unknown number.

her sister tried to fix things up

I received the phone and said, “Hello!”

“Hello! Do you remember me?” A girl asked.

“No! I am sorry I couldn’t recognize you.” I said.

“I am Trishna, Pranshi’s eldest sister.” She said.

Till then, I didn’t have her number on my phone. Then I replied, “Oh, yes. I didn’t have your number on my phone so, I couldn’t recognize you.”

“It’s alright. So, how are you?” She asked.

“Yeah! I am good.” I replied.

“I know whatever Pranshi did to you wasn’t fair. She is not mature enough to understand you. She is following her friend’s wicked advice. That’s why she has lost her intelligence.” She said.

“Yeah! I know. But what can I do now? She has done this for the second time.” I said.

“I request you to talk to her and she will gradually understand you.” She said.

“No! I can’t. I don’t even want to talk to her. She alleged me in front of your mom. My only fault was I caught her with a stranger.” I replied.

“Yes, I know everything. That was not good. But trust me. If you talk to her again and give her some time, she will never leave you. She did this out of immaturity. She is repenting now.” She said.

“Okay! I will talk to her after some days. I am not feeling good now.” I said.

“Yes, you take your time.” She said.

finally, she apologized

I hung up the call and felt a bit relaxed. Although I was angry with Pranshi, deep inside I wanted her back in my life. I had never looked at any other girl except her. So, it was very difficult for me to leave her. I was thinking of calling her, and then Pranshi called me up. She apologized to me, and she seemed very sad and disturbed.

“I don’t understand. Why are you doing all this nonsense and getting disturbed? Why don’t you keep life simple? Just because I couldn’t give you time, you approached another guy. So, that was your love for me right!” I chastised her.

“I am sorry! I couldn’t realize it at that moment. I will not do this again.” She said.

I became happy after hearing such words from her. But from inside, I was feeling a bit weird. As if someone was telling me from inside, “She will do this again. Don’t trust her.”

But I didn’t care about it. I became normal, and we started talking to each other like before. After some days, my first year’s final exam appeared. Since I was so much engrossed in my relationship, I couldn’t focus on my studies. As a result, I performed very poorly. I admitted before my dad that I couldn’t do well. I also promised him to do well in the second-year final exam.

a MUCH-NEEDED break

After my exams, we had an off for 10 days. I wanted a break from my life. I talked to Sumay-uncle over WhatsApp and informed him about my vacation. So, he invited me to his place. He wanted me to spend more time with him so that, I could grow more spiritually. I went to his place, and he was happy to see me.

“So, how’s life going?” He asked.

“Everything is good.” I replied.

“Really! I don’t think so. I feel like you are completely lost in your world. You are always busy with material affairs and that is constantly eating you up.” He replied.

“Yes, I have to. Since at this age, I must endeavor to make my career.” I replied.

“You think I haven’t made my career? Am I not earning money?” He asked.

“But your situation is different than mine.” I replied.

“Okay. You chill out here and spend more time with spirituality.” He said.

The next day we visited the temple of Lord Krishna. It was about 20-25 KM away from his house. The premise was beautifully decorated with a lot of beautiful paintings and sculptures. Inside the main temple, there was the deity of Lord Krishna. After offering my obeisance to the deity, I and Sumay-uncle sat in a hall to have lunch. The servitors served verities of Prasadam. It was delicious. After eating Prasadam we took a rest for about half an hour. Then we returned home.

curiosity arose in my mind

While returning to his house from the temple, a question arose in my mind, and I immediately asked him, “How does Krishna look? Like Some of the pictures portray Him as black and some portray him as blue. But what is His color?”

He looked at me and said, “Krishna’s color is like a cloud containing water. The beauty of nature is only a tiny percent of His beauty.”

After hearing him, I became curious to know more about Lord Krishna & His pastimes. So, I asked him for some scriptures and resources to learn more about Krishna.

“The day you will go back to your home, I will give you some books to read and lectures to hear.” Sumay-uncle replied.

We reached home in an hour. After some time, his friends gathered in front of the temple room and did Kirtan by playing various musical instruments. After the kirtan, all of them went to a room for attending the spiritual class. Some of his friends and cousin brothers asked him questions related to spirituality.

Someone asked, “How we are related to God? What is our natural function?”

Sumay-uncle replied, “We are all parts and parcels of Krishna. He is the Supreme person, and we are His children. This world is not our real home. Everything in this world is temporary. Our bodies are also temporary. We are living inside this temporary body. We are eternal and belong to the eternal spiritual world.”

After hearing his words, I felt like it was just a story. I couldn’t accept his words easily.

“So, how can we go back to the Spiritual world?” I asked.

“This process of chanting the Holy Names of Krishna is the only way to get out of this world and go back to our original world.” he said.

I didn’t know anything about it. But his explanation was simple, and that moved me. Then he played an audio lecture. As soon as he played the lecture everyone bowed down to the speaker. I also imitated them but didn’t understand the reason behind them. A person started speaking about life, our real identity, and our connection with the Supreme Person. After 10 minutes the lecture was over, and all of them including my uncle again bowed down and shouted, “Jay Srila Prabhupada”. I learned that the person who was speaking was Srila Prabhupada.

Till then I knew that the founder Acharya of ISKCON (International Society for Krishna Consciousness) is known as Srila Prabhupada. And he was an old man who belonged to India. But the person I heard seemed to be an American. These kinds of doubts began to poke my mind. So, I asked my uncle to clear these doubts. He said, after the class, we would sit together and talk about it. After that, he asked me to sit with him in his room and he spoke a lot of things about Krishna, Srila Prabhupada, and my life. Then he asked me something that I had never expected.

Stay tuned to know what he asked…